Yesterday I took a test that was supposed to tell me my strengths. It was from a book called Strengths Finder 2.0 by Tom Rath. It is based off of research from a guy named Don Clifton, who was a psychologist, and invented the Clifton StrengthsFinder.

Anyway, I did an online test which comprised of close to 200 questions, and an algorithm calculated my 5 “supposed” strengths based on my answers.

It doesn’t matter what my strengths are, since I don’t think 4 out of the 5 really apply to me. They kind of do, but aren’t really what I imagined my strengths to be.

I think what’s interesting to me is that even though I’m already in my 30s, I still don’t really know who I am, or what I am good at.

I was thinking about this when I was taking this test, and realized that my personality is so vague. Even a simple question like, am I an introvert or an extrovert? I can be both. I prefer being introverted, but I see the need at being extroverted, both in terms of my job and career, and I would say that I definitely don’t lack social / communication skills.

In fact, sometimes because of my job, I have to talk a lot. I have to force myself to talk to people, or to socialize, but I don’t really like doing it, nor do I see the point. I just do it because it’s part of the job, or it will make me better at my job.

I think I need to spend a good long time really thinking about who I am.

At this point, I’m kind of just drifting through life. Yeh, maybe I am trying hard at work, and it looks like I am successful because I have a stable job and I’m getting promoted and getting a raise every once in a while, but it still feels like I don’t really know what I am doing.

The book made a good point that I should try to refine and improve my strengths instead of fixing my weaknesses.

I think that this is a great point and is something I should actively do. For example, my Chinese may never be up to par to that of a native speaker, so maybe I shouldn’t focus as much of my time on improving my Chinese. However, on the flip side, I am living in China and my future is here, so there is still a need for me to improve to be better and more efficient, no matter what I do.

But other skills? I don’t even know what I am good at. It’s frustrating, but hopefully I can figure it out by really looking at myself and asking myself some tough questions.

Calvin’s Corner 8